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Why Dogs Are Better Than Kids
If they don't behave, you can put them in a crate and not go to jail.
If you go to the store, you can leave them home alone, and not go to jail.
If they get pregnant, you can sell the puppies.
You can neuter them.
If you go on vacation, you can put them in a kennel.
Dog food and water is much cheaper than formula and diapers.
Dogs never grow out of being kissed in front of their friends.
Dogs hide their "blankies" in their crates rather than dragging them around in public.
The older a Dog gets, the more they like you.
Dogs don't ask why. Dogs don't ask why. Dogs don't ask why.
Dogs don't roll their eyes when you insist Dogs today have it easier.
Dog poop is easier to get off the wall than crayon.
The dog wont tell your husband that you're having an affair with the landscaper.
When Dogs interrupt you making love, you don't have to explain that the two of you are "wrestling"
Getting a puppy won't give you stretch marks.
It doesn't take 45 minutes to get a dog ready to go outside in the winter.
You don't need to get an extra phone line for a dog.
Average cost of sending my dog to school: $52, Your kid: $103,000.
Your dog is not embarrassed if you sing in public.
Dogs don't like Barney.
Dogs never criticize your cooking.
You can never gross your dog out.
If your dog turns out bad, your genes are not blamed.