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How to bathe a dog at home
1. Get your items ready- shampoo, conditioner, towels, washcloth.
2. Mix any shampoos/conditioners to the proper consistancy (many need diluted).
3. Locate dog.
4. Catch dog.
5. Go to the cabinet and get a leash since the dog will not come willingly.
6. Convince the dog that he's not going on a walk- pry him from the front door.
7. Get a handful of milkbones and make a trail from the front door to the bathroom.
8. Once he's close enough to the bathroom, get a good grip on him and get him into the bathroom. Close bathroom door!.
9. Wrestle dog into tub.
10. Start water- adjust to proper temperature.
11. Wrestle dog back into tub.
12. Wet dog starting at the base of the skull and working down to the tail. Don't forget to get legs completely.
13. Wrestle dog back into tub.
14. Use washcloth around the dogs face and eyes to moisten.
15. Remove washcloth from dogs mouth.
16. Get new washcloth since a shredded one isn't much use.
17. Wrestle dog back into tub.
18. Starting at the base of the skull, apply shampoo and scrub dog thoroughly. Use washcloth to apply shampoo on face.
19. Remove washcloth from dogs mouth.
20. Wrestle dog back into tub.
21. Rinse shampoo from the dog completley.
22. Wrestle dog back into tub.
23. Apply conditioner to dog starting at the base of the skull down to the tail.
24. Wrestle dog back into tub.
25. Rinse dog completely.
26. Don't put dog back in tub.
27. Thorougly dry with towels.
28. Remove towel from dogs mouth.
29. Use a blowdryer on low heat to dry dog fully.
30. Call repairman to fix the bathroom door that the dog broke down attempting to get away from the hair dryer.
31. Change your bed linens since the dog has just jumped on your bed and rolled to dry himself.
32. Tip for next bath: Take him to the groomer!